I Want One of Those

Look, let’s be honest: we all pretend that cell phones are the best and there’s nothing that old phones could do better, but we are lying to ourselves. Making an actual call on a cell phone is a total nightmare. They’re massive and hard to get your hand around, they’re heavy and make your arm tired, and they can run hot, meaning that pressing them against your face to talk just makes you a sweaty mess.

So let’s all admit that an old handset plugged into a cell phone is actually a genius idea. Old handsets are ergonomically designed to fit nicely in your hand. They’re lightweight, and they don’t get hot. If wanting this setup makes me an old person, then I am happy to claim to be an old person.