You do you, mister

We’re sick and tired of hearing about gender-appropriate beach attire. If a guy wants to wear a bikini bottom with a flower pattern, whose business is it to tell him he shouldn’t? Nobody’s, that’s whose! So, mister, be proud of wearing your flower bikini, and show the world that you’re not somebody to mess with.

Well, we got this completely wrong. That man isn’t wearing the flower-pattern bikini. That’s actually the hindquarters of a woman that’s bending down and tending to her child. That’s actually a relief, really. We’re sure that those bottoms on a man would leave very little to the imagination.